A Visit to Downton
by JessieBess
Summary: Two years after leaving Downton, Tom finally brings Sybbie for a visit.


As the train wound through the glorious English countryside Tom had a pang of guilt looking at the gentle rolling hills with trees draped in a colorful array of reds, yellows, and oranges, that stood in bright contrast to the deep blue of the almost cloudless sky. Fluffy white sheep grazed on the still green fields. The tranquil scenes outside the rail car's window were in stark contrast to his daily world of city grime and dust.

As they past one field, a young girl riding a chestnut colored horse stopped and watched as the train passed by.

"Daddy … Daddy … a horse" Sybbie cried out in delight as she stood on her tiptoes, leaning up against the side of the rail car, her face just barely high enough to look out the window. Whether or not it was Sybbie the girl on the horse saw, she waved and Sybbie tapped her little hands against the window in response.

Looking from his daughter to the young girl on the horse, Tom thought that if they had stayed at Downton, he'd be able to amble down to the stables with Sybbie where she could pet them and one day learn to ride. If only he had stayed at Downton, sheep and cows would be a familiar sight to Sybbie rather than some exotic creatures. If only he had stayed at Downton, Sybbie would have fields to run in and trees to swing from and …

Tom briefly closed his eyes and took a deep breath. If only he had stayed at Downton but he knew in his heart he could never have stayed there.

In many ways Tom dreaded this trip but he knew he had to do it. It had been over two years since Tom and Sybbie had moved to Liverpool.

To their credit the Crawleys had tried to persuade him to stay at Downton even though he knew that it was more for Sybbie's sake than his own. While the job off of estate manager had been enticing and he certainly would have enjoyed working with Matthew, Tom knew he didn't really want to stay. It was just too heartbreaking to stay with all the reminders of his beloved Sybil.

And in his heart he knew he really didn't fit in with the family and especially not now without Sybil. After their inglorious return to Downton, the things he had done for Sybil's sake he couldn't do without her there. Dressing up every night to just eat dinner with the same people he had seen all day was just plain silly to his way of thinking and something he thought he could never get used to. He also felt that Robert would always look at him and wonder why the chauffeur was sitting at his dining table eating his food and drinking his wine.

So when Sybbie was four months old, Tom accepted his brother's offer and moved to Liverpool. He had always loved working with cars and the garage was doing quite well. They might not be living in the grand style of Downton, but it was more comfortable and comforting to Tom.

Opening his eyes he saw that Sybbie was now trying to climb up on the seat opposite him. He quickly leaned over and pulled her up onto his lap. She looked up at him with that wide eyed innocence and a broad smile and he felt his heart flutter as he was so reminded of her mother.

"Book Daddy"

Tom reached into the bag beside him and pulled out a small picture book. It was one that Edith had sent Sybbie and one of her favorites. He smiled thinking how surprising it was to him that the things Edith sent were the most suitable for Sybbie.

Cora, Mary and Edith had kept in touch with Tom through the post sending him not only letters but packages of clothes and toys for Sybbie. With each package and letter came an offer for Tom to come visit them. He always declined stating that work was so busy but that when things got quieter he would come for a visit. He did make sure in his letters to proudly announce all of the milestones of Sybbie's life like her first words and her crawling and then walking as well as describe her personality. He wrote of how Sybbie played with her toys and her liked and dislikes.

But Tom knew that no matter how detailed his letters were, it was no substitute for actually seeing her. Yet he never invited them to visit him in Liverpool. He wasn't ashamed of their small flat but he couldn't imagine Cora or Mary or Edith sitting on the worn second-hand sofa in his sitting room drinking tea out of chipped mugs. He didn't want to see the disapproval or distaste in their eyes when they saw Sybbie's nursery was actually just a crib in the corner of his bedroom.

And so he found himself finally agreeing to bring Sybbie to Downton for a visit but this would just be a day trip for he couldn't bring himself to stay overnight at Downton. He couldn't walk down that corridor, he couldn't pass that bedroom where for that brief time he had sat beside Sybil as she held Sybbie in her arms, and where just a few hours later Sybil had drawn her last breaths.

One of Sybbie's most endearing qualities was her boundless curiosity of the world around her. She would never sit down until she had explored the room she was in and this included the railway compartment. The train had delighted Sybbie and she reveled in the passing scenery. Her eyes grew wide hearing the train's whistle at each stop. She'd rush from the window seat to the compartment's door to watch the flow of passengers and then back to the window to watch the comings and goings on the platform. As the train pulled out of each station she would nod her head in rhythm to the train's movement delighted to once again be moving.

As he stepped from the train on to the Downton station platform, Tom was surprised to see Cora waiting on the platform. The minute she spotted him she rushed to him with a wide smile on her face. Before Tom could even introduce the toddler whose hand he held, Cora knelt down to be at eye level with her.

"You must be Sybbie" Cora said as she reached out her arms to hug her.

Sybbie looked from the strange woman up to her father. "It's your Grandma Cora" Tom told her. It was then that the toddler embraced the woman's hug. As tears fell from Cora's cheeks Tom knew he had done the right thing in bring Sybbie here.


End file.
